Life as a college student is no joke. From sun up to sun down students are either trapped in their books, studying or trying to make a few dollars at their low income job. For most students, the college life they live today was nothing they imagined. Take Drumline for example: boy graduates from high school, finds the perfect school, meets the perfect girl, finds the best of friends and makes his band a legend. Yeah right! If life we’re just that simple. Growing up, even I was fooled as to how life would be in college, but I didn’t really learn the truth until I lived the experience. This brings me to my topic for today: friendships.
There are various types of friendships: you have your cliques, homies, role dogs, aces and besties; and truth be told starting off my freshman year in college, I wanted them all. I remember nights I’d pray to God for the perfect roommate and that we’d get along. (At that time the movie ‘The Roommate’ had just came out so I was a bit skeptical about who my own would be- I just knew I didn’t want a psycho.) So once my freshman year came around I got exactly what I wanted- the perfect roommate. She reminded me of the older sister I never had, and would be the listening ear I needed when I couldn’t express myself to my parents. So once that year was over, I was determined to drag her along to the next stage in my life as a sophomore. Little did I know, I was setting my self up. Nevertheless my trial taught me to be careful for what I wished for and stay in tune with God because if not, I’d find myself in a rut that I wouldn’t be able to get out of.
“To flatter friends is to lay a trap to their feet”-Proverbs 29:5 (NLT)
For three full years I found myself turning into someone I was not. I began to do things that went against my Christian morals, and even though I knew they were wrong I continued to do them just to flatter my friends. However that only left me alone and empty. All along God was trying to speak to me, but my ears were not in tune to what he was saying and honestly I was ignoring Him. Think about it: Have you ever been in a situation that you knew wasn’t right and just before you were about to partake in that activity your mother or a relative would call to check up on you? To be honest that was no coincidence. That was God chastises you. Letting you know what you were about to partake in was not right. As annoying as that can be, in the future, I would suggest you take heed into what God is trying to tell you before it is to late.
Keep in mind, this message isn’t meant to discourage you or have you separate away from your friends. It is simply to inform you that everyone who says they are your friend is not. Be aware and stay alert for the devil is out there seeking whom he may devour (1 Peter 5:8). If you find yourself in a situation that isn’t for you, step away. Trust me, friends come and go but God’s love is forever. No matter how hurtful it may feel to leave your crew or set yourself from evildoers, I promise you’ll be making the best decision in the long run.
After my friends had scorned me, and I poured out my tears to God (Job 16:20), I began to hear Him clearly. He informed me the reason certain people were no longer apart of my life anymore was because I was putting my faith and trust in them and Him. By telling all of my problems to my friends and listening to my friends, I began to neglect God.By doing so He had to teach me a lesson. So be mindful and ask yourself:
- How are my friends benefiting me?
- Am I connecting closer with Christ or moving away from Him?
- Have I or am I turning into someone I’m not?
- How is God being gloried in this friendship?
Just by asking yourself these questions and evaluating the people you associate with God will began to show you who your real friends are. Even if you end up with none remember God knows your heart and knows what is best for you. So in due time, that friend or crew will come.
There are friends who destroy each other but a real friend sticks closer than a brother- Proverbs 18:24 (NLT)
Jonathan McReynolds- Pressure